Omg, such a touching piece of writing. The language of grief is so important - I realise it now after reading this article. This is a new concept to me.
I still mourn the death of my father I lost 16 years ago, and it feels as if it was only yesterday. I haven’t been able to find words to talk about how much I miss him ever since, but it has surely eaten into me over the years.
Thanks for writing this article. Such a beautiful piece…
I recently found myself comforting a person who lost a partner of over 60 years. I found it difficult to construct the opening words as I was also affected. But after sharing how we remember the deceased,
I found myslef concluding that "Love and Rleationships never fade away and the deceased shall always remain Significant in our lives." At times swing like a pendulum when it is difficult, we remember her interventions and giving hope but when in happiness also remember her on how she would laugh, share happiness with all of us. At times as a motivator, that " I am doing this for her". I really need to develop ice-breaking or opening words when talking about Grief. Any suggestions?
God bless you for your kind intentions & noble efforts.
You did it well in this case. And you will continue to do well as long as you remain full present in the here & now space of the moment, present both to the person, as well as your own self. When we are present, we are able to listen to the alive energy in that alive space. And an intuitive part of our being knows precisely what to be, say or do. Which includes holding the space in compassionate silence. Being in compassion doesn’t create an obligation to “do or say” something. Sometimes compassion is more eloquent in just a “quiet being” , present & connected at every level. And as for words, go with your sensing in the moment. What you are yourself awkward, anxious or apprehensive about - drop that. Remember you are Companioning the griever for them. So honour their needs, their way.
Finally don’t say/do anything because you are expected to. It would backfire on both sides.
Very beautiful and heartfelt. Thank you for this article.
Many thanks Nancy.
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Omg, such a touching piece of writing. The language of grief is so important - I realise it now after reading this article. This is a new concept to me.
I still mourn the death of my father I lost 16 years ago, and it feels as if it was only yesterday. I haven’t been able to find words to talk about how much I miss him ever since, but it has surely eaten into me over the years.
Thanks for writing this article. Such a beautiful piece…
Many thanks Hardeep for your kind words. Will always be there to help you affirm and process your grief, if you so want.
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Gratitude
Thank you for the advice .
Gratitude
I recently found myself comforting a person who lost a partner of over 60 years. I found it difficult to construct the opening words as I was also affected. But after sharing how we remember the deceased,
I found myslef concluding that "Love and Rleationships never fade away and the deceased shall always remain Significant in our lives." At times swing like a pendulum when it is difficult, we remember her interventions and giving hope but when in happiness also remember her on how she would laugh, share happiness with all of us. At times as a motivator, that " I am doing this for her". I really need to develop ice-breaking or opening words when talking about Grief. Any suggestions?
Dear David
God bless you for your kind intentions & noble efforts.
You did it well in this case. And you will continue to do well as long as you remain full present in the here & now space of the moment, present both to the person, as well as your own self. When we are present, we are able to listen to the alive energy in that alive space. And an intuitive part of our being knows precisely what to be, say or do. Which includes holding the space in compassionate silence. Being in compassion doesn’t create an obligation to “do or say” something. Sometimes compassion is more eloquent in just a “quiet being” , present & connected at every level. And as for words, go with your sensing in the moment. What you are yourself awkward, anxious or apprehensive about - drop that. Remember you are Companioning the griever for them. So honour their needs, their way.
Finally don’t say/do anything because you are expected to. It would backfire on both sides.
With light
Neena